Studying Islam

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[quote]No little girl longs to grow up and be called the “second wife” I know it is a cultural phenomena and one of the stigmas of the Asian societies that ‘a husband’s second wife is the worst thing that can happen to a woman’. It can be any situation ‘to be the second wife’ or for a husband to ‘bring in the second wife.’ The Arab women have no problem with it because that is the way they’ve been raised to view it at least that is the impression I have. How should we view the situation? First of all if Allah has permitted it, how can one oppose it or be ‘totally against it’? Once this is established that a man has the right to have more than one wife then why can’t we accept it? Why is the second wife viewed as an outcast? In most cases when a man wants to marry it is assumed the woman he wants to marry is someone whose character is questionable, someone who is a clever and conniving and has trapped this innocent man. The blame falls on the  woman  be it the first wife for not keeping the husband happy or on the second one for trapping the innocent man somehow the man is not held responsible. The question arises  why does a man want to marry again when he already has a wife? , I think  why a man would want to keep two wives is because he is ‘out’ of love with the first one and ‘in’ love with someone else. The point is that if he is then why should the first wife care what he does or doesn’t do when the major factor, love, has fallen out of her equation with him? She cannot keep him tied to herself forcibly. So why are Muslim women still hell bent to oppose a law pre-determined by Allah?[/quote]

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