Studying Islam

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[quote]I think you do not understand what I am saying here.

Here are two issues.

First, marrying someone in secret without telling first wife.

Second, marrying someone without permission of first wife while letting her know what your are doing.

Now the spirit of the nikkah is that you should openly announce it. Correct? We know that from Sunnah. So if a man marries a seond woman and does not announce it to everyone including to the first wife, then that is against the spirit of the nikkah.

I am more focussed on the second point. The permission. You asked me to show you a verse where it says he needs no permission. I ask you to show me a verse where it says he needs it. We won't find any either way. However in the Quran, the conditions for nikkah are explicitly given. Asking any one's permission is not a requirement. What you are proposing might be a bidda, so we need to be careful and discuss the issue calmly.

Now your question of verse 4.5, where word foolish is used. Please read the verse before it. The section is about women, the word foolish is being used for some spend thrift wives, you can verify that from any tafseer. I guess you could apply it in general also.

>>> What I am stating is that all decisions need to be jointly taken and in full agreement of both parties.

How often do you have agreement of all parties on an issue. My wife and I can never agree on 90% of the things. What you are proposing is impractical.

And you cannot deny that Islam is a religion that encourages patriarchy. You might not like it, but ask anyone, thats the way it is. In matters of rewards and punishment, the man and woman are weighed in the same manner. In terms of inheritance, financial transactions, the woman is clearly not at the same level as man is. The woman is the one who is stuck for 9 months with a child in the womb and milking the baby for another year after birth. Man is not, he is free to move about, to work, to provide. Look up the definition of patriarchy, then compare that to Islam.

Now I ask you about this scenario. One is away from home in a different country and cannot communicate with wife or family. He might be doing jihad and fighting enemy. He meets orphans and widows and wishes to take care of them by providing them his shelter or home. So he decides to marry them. Would you make the 2nd nikkah invalid because he did not get permission from first wife?[/quote]

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