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[quote]Dear sweet16, Wa 'Alaikumu-ssalaam. 
Jakaakallah for praying for my cousin.
Also, I'm glad that the websit is benefitting you.
As for your question, I thank you for asking it. I love it when people ask questions about Islam, because of the reward that answering them brings. You just gave me a chance to clear your doubt. You have no idea how much I'll be rewarded for clearing it (Insha'Allah).
Sister, Allah says in the Holy Qur'an: "Each soul gets what it strives for." That means that we have to strive as much as we can, and leave the rest to Allah by praying to Him. Suppose a person, who wants to give an exam, goes to a fortune-teller to know whether he'll pass the exam. The fortune-teller tells him that he'll not pass the exam. The person therefore loses all hope and does not study. As a result of not studying, he fails the exam. If he hadn't listened to the fortune-teller, he would've passed the exam. Therefore we are not aware of what our destinies will bring, and that's where the test lies. However, there are four things which we cannot change no matter how much we strive. Volume 8, Book 77, Number 594: 
Narrated Anas bin Malik:

The Prophet said, "Allah puts an angel in charge of the uterus and the angel says, 'O Lord, (it is) semen! O Lord, (it is now ) a clot! O Lord, (it is now) a piece of flesh.' And then, if Allah wishes to complete its creation, the angel asks, 'O Lord, (will it be) a male or a female? A wretched (an evil doer) or a blessed (doer of good)? How much will his provisions be? What will his age be?' So all that is written while the creature is still in the mother's womb." These things are fixed and we cannot change them. Another Hadeeth says that a man will do the deeds which he has been created to do, i.e. he'll be destined to do those deeds. His success depends upon the amount of strife. He only has to strive and leave the rest to Allah.
And it must be remembered that Allah only [b]knows[/b] the [b]RESULTS[/b] of a man's strife. He [b]does not fix [/b] those results, otherwise a person would keep on striving with all his might but would get nothing if his destiny was fixed to be bad. That would be unfair, and we know that Allah is the most fair. I'll give you an example. Suppose a student has to give an exam. Even before taking the exam, the teacher of that student tells him that he'll pass with flying colours. How? Because she knows her student very well. She knows that he's hard-working. But does that mean that the student stops seeking help from the teacher? If the student did that, he'd fail. The teacher only [b]predicts/knows [/b] that her student will pass. She [b]does not guarantee[/b] it. If she were to gaurantee the student's success, then what would be the point of a test/exam? Similarly, Allah also [b]knows[/b] what a person's future will be. He does not guarantee any such thing. If He were to tell everyone what his future has in store for him, then why would there be the need of a test in this world. So Allah only [b]knows[/b] the results of a person's strife. It does not mean that a person should stop praying for himself, thinking that his future is ordained. Allah has given us an intellect, and He wants us to use it. Then He'll give us the rewards that we deserve.
I hope I've clarified the issue (Maashaa'Allah). If you still have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask. 
Jazaak Allah wassalaamu 'alaikum.[/quote]

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