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[quote]Wa alaikum assalam sister

In my experience, one of the main reasons (although not necessarily always) a muslim marriage ends up in divorce or in the UK Courts is because either one or both of them lack faith in Islam. Unfortunate, I know. This is from my own practical experience (explained below) and therefore it does not apply to all.

I practice family law in a town with a good muslim population and a few mosques, alhamdulillah.

To substantiate my comment above, I would briefly cite the following (anonomysed for reasons of confidentiality):

(1) My very first muslim case was where I acted for the wife wishing to defend the husband's petition for divorce. She accepted that they could no longer live together and that the marriage was at an end but wished to defend out of spite. Despite being advised not to do so (the reasons my learned colleagues and sisters in Islam will be aware of)she wished to persist. She was in receipt of income support but Public Funding was denied. Nonetheless, she chose to pay for my services privately (very expensive for her). All of this was to stop the husband from bringing his new wife over from abroad. I will let you imagine the ending. Not very islamic. Unfortunately, I was not practising at the time and therefore I did not consider Islam, may Allah forgive me.

(2) The second muslim case involved an application to Court for an injunction with a power of arrest against the muslim boyfriend for violence and sexual assault. My client was the non-muslim girlfriend and the mother of the muslim boyfriend's child. The boyfriend had a really beautiful Islamic name. I did not get to advise the muslim brother as I never saw him (because he did not turn up at Court)and also because he was the opponent.

(3) The third case involved a muslim lady seeking divorce from her husband. After giving her the legal advice, I advised her to put Islam before everything else and treat the rest as secondary. She gave me a strange look, as if I was advising her to do something she did not seek advice on.

(4) The fourth case involved a muslim man seeking divorce from his wife. He initially tried to deceive the Court into the granting of the decree of divorce (by pretending that his wife was in this country when she was not and by forging her signature) through another solicitor. The Court found out and accordingly placed a bar on it. He then came to me. When I heard the names of his children (which I did not think was islamically right) I advised him to speak to an Imam about them to find out whether or not they should be changed. I once again got a strange look.

(5) and finally but not the final case,  I was instructed by a muslim lady for divorce. She was not practising and she used swear words in almost every sentences. As she was hurt and upset, I was polite and empathetic and therefore put up with it. I normally don't.

It is also worrying that the issue of "Talaq" appeared to be in none of my clients' minds. I had to advise them at the end of the case. I do not advise them of this initially in the hope that they would reconcile.

The point I am trying to make is that, referring matters to an Imam or another Islamic organisation is optional and therefore both parties would have to agree. If they both agree then they are both likely to be practising muslims (otherwise the non-practising one would not agree due to the decision of the Islamic organisation having no legal force in this country) and if they are both practising muslims, they are unlikley to have a problem (which warrants divorce) in their marriage.

The above comments (apart from the case scenarios) are my thoughts only and I make lots of mistakes even in my thoughts (may Allah forgive me) and therefore I would welcome any constructive criticisms or disagreements, if any. After all, we are all here to learn from one another, Inshallah.

Regards
Saif[/quote]

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