Powered by
UI
Techs
Home
>
Forums
>
>
Women's Issues
>
Upbrnging of children
Post Reply
Username
Password
Format
Andale Mono
Arial
Arial Black
Book Antiqua
Century Gothic
Comic Sans MS
Courier New
Georgia
Impact
Tahoma
Times New Roman
Trebuchet MS
Script MT Bold
Stencil
Verdana
Lucida Console
1
2
3
4
5
6
Message Icon
Message
- Forum Code is ON
- HTML is OFF
Smilies
[quote][blue]some children grow up in families where guilt is used as a means of control. That is, the message (usually non-verbal) is communicated that if you do what I want you to do; behave the way I want you to behave; conform to my wishes; and for some, if you believe what I want you to believe, I will give you my love and approval. If the child doesn't conform, love and approval are withheld and the child is made to feel guilty. This kind of love is called conditional love, which isn't love at all. It's control. And tragically, false guilt is often used in religious circles to get adherents to conform to leaders' dictatorial control—and people who don't conform are made to feel guilty. This is false guilt.[/blue] [purple]In the faith and in our society guilt is a legal term. If we have disobeyed God or the law of the land, we are guilty whether we feel guilty or not. The appropriate emotional response for when we have done wrong in faith terms is godly sorrow. This is the way we rightly feel when we have sinned and done wrong. If we don't, we may have a dulled or dead conscience. However, at least in our Western society, we tend to think of guilt as an emotional response, so that's the way I will address it here. With real guilt, when we confess our sin and wherever possible put wrongs right, we should no longer feel guilty. God forgives us and we are no longer under condemnation. If we still feel guilty, chances are it is false guilt and/or shame. True guilt says you have done bad (or badly). False guilt makes you feel bad even when you are not guilty. And shame says you are bad; that is, a bad person. The latter two are both psychologically damaging and are conditioned or learned responses.[/purple] source: email[/quote]
Mode
Prompt
Help
Basic
Check here to be notified by email whenever someone replies to your topic
Show Preview
Share
|
Copyright
Studying-Islam
© 2003-7 |
Privacy Policy
|
Code of Conduct
|
An Affiliate of
Al-Mawrid Institute of Islamic Sciences ®
Top