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ayesha
PAKISTAN
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 Topic initiated on Saturday, August 2, 2003 - 1:21 AM 
False ego
Each and everyone of us has a characteristic known as 'the ego'. When one becomes too full of oneself, the ego tends to take a direction when it starts becoming 'false'. There is such a thin line between 'self esteem' and 'false ego? that it makes distinction very blurred.
This is probably a silent combat that we face everyday. What are the ways we can prevent 'self esteem' becoming 'false ego'? |
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AminahStar
USA
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Posted - Saturday, August 2, 2003 - 1:43 AM 
I think that a good way of preventing a false ego is to learn how to take criticism. It can be very difficult for the ego to digest it sometimes, but if we learn how to accept and apply it we can prevent our ego from becoming false.
Another great way is to remember Allah and His creation. When we think on this deeply it helps us to realize how insignificant we are as compared to all of creation. This attitude helps us to stay humble.
Edited by - AminahStar on August 02 2003 02:32:31 |
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ayesha
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, August 2, 2003 - 2:36 AM
Actually, properly viewed, ego is not directly positively or negatively correlated with criticism. People who are able to take criticism and improvise also have the possibility of falling into the ego trap.
Everything belongs to Allah and He is the Lord of the worlds and everything that lies therein. That being said and accepted, certain elements still exist. The feeling of belonging, anger, depression, fear and the list goes on.
If we cannot do away with all of the above mentioned, (however much may we believe in God and fear Him) how can we do away with our ego? |
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AminahStar
USA
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Posted - Saturday, August 2, 2003 - 2:56 AM
These are merely ways that may help. I am not saying that these are the ultimate solutions.
I disagree that criticism does not have an affect on the ego. If an ego is a balanced one it can easily accept and apply it and be less likely to fall into an ego trap, whereas a person with a false ego may harbor resentment to the person giving the criticism, thinking he or she is better than the other. |
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ayesha
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, August 2, 2003 - 3:08 AM
| What are the ways to make your ego 'balanced'? |
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aslam
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Sunday, August 3, 2003 - 12:32 AM
Salamooooooona,
Aminah could not be more right!Weighing and accepting criticism and admitting one,s mistakes and weakneses and pondering over the greatness of Allah really help in deflating one,s bloated ego.
Acknowledging the greater "ego"helps balance one,s
wayward ego. |
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ayesha
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Sunday, August 3, 2003 - 7:51 AM
There are two kinds of ego:
1. Self worth/self esteem
2. False ego
The key to attain a balance between the two is to develop a sense of sound judgment. Judgment is a part of the innate guidance that every human being is endowed with. It needs to be exercised constantly in order to develop further and strengthen.
Being able to take criticism is one aspect that essentially indicates that a certain level of balance has already been achieved. It, however, may not play a major role in ‘attaining’ the balance. It is the constant analytical appraisal of one’s self that helps one move towards an equilibrium between the two. Self-analysis is the kind of ‘criticism’ that works the best in attaining a balanced ego. It’s important always to work around the equilibrium. |
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Jhangeer Hanif
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Tuesday, August 5, 2003 - 7:19 AM
I think your (to Ayesha) first statement was very realistic in which you asserted that our ego/self esteem tends to take a wrong direction under certain circumstances.
Criticism does effect our sense of self worth. Anyone, who is devoid of the courage to receive criticism with open mind, cannot prevent his self esteem from turning into false ego. However, criticism alone does not necessarily encompass all that contributes to the mischievous performance of false ego.
More appropriately, the probability of our self-esteem taking the form of false ego becomes stronger when we ‘see’, ‘hear’ or ‘feel’ what we do ‘want’ to. You see, criticism is essentially included in this list. You do not have a car but your neighbor passes you by driving a new marvelous Mercedes; no criticism has been made—but the damage is done if you are not vigilant enough to stop the whispers of Satan. Many a time, no word is spoken but your ego is hurt—badly hurt. It is this point where you need to be very cautious. It is where you should not cross the limits set by the Shari’ah and your innate sense of right and wrong.
I think we must make a determination that we would not follow the whispers of Satan; we will not overrule the dictations of the Shari’ah and innate guidance. This determination is what, I believe, a road map for balanced ego or sheer self-esteem devoid of the elements of false ego. |
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Jhangeer Hanif
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, October 18, 2003 - 4:10 PM
The road to attain this 'Balanced Ego' is very long and tricky as well.
Move, we must on. Drag, we must further.
We should know that the Lord is the WAY as well as the DESTINATION. Whoever has set out on this WAY has already reached the DESTINATION.
So, despair we must never! |
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xxbasxx
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Friday, February 13, 2004 - 1:53 AM
remember hu u r.
dnt let others build ur character.
thts the worst ppunishment 2 self.
ego cn b so evil.
shaytaan was kikd out of God's love and his previous position (envied by us) as an angel by his ego.
i hv 2 say we al need 2 set our priorities straight.
XxBasmahxX |
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ayesha
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Friday, February 13, 2004 - 10:42 AM
| He never held the position of an angel. |
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Jhangeer Hanif
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Friday, February 13, 2004 - 1:06 PM
do we envy the position of Angles? Do we want to become good humans or we aspire to become angles? |
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ihsan
USA
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Posted - Friday, February 13, 2004 - 10:01 PM
1. One should also not be so critical as to fall into despair. Thus, there is a balance that needs to be struck even in this regard. If one were overly critical, he/she may succumb to an overburdening guilt that may make him fall into despair. One should not be deceived into thinking that because one has fallen, one cannot correct one's self, and take the event as a learning experience. I believe this was one of the teachings of the story of Adam, for when he repented, not only did God forgive him, but provided him with GUIDANCE.
2. Here is an interesting point regarding Jhangeer's question:
Did not Shaytan use this very deception in trying to convince Adam and His Wife to eat from the tree? "Your Lord desires not that you become angels." It is pretty ironic, because as Mustansir Mir pointed out, it was prior to this that the Almighty had ordered the angels to bow down before Adam. Surely, man is forgetful.
Al-Mawrid Course |
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