| Author | Topic |
Malix
UNITED KINGDOM
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 Topic initiated on Thursday, July 29, 2004 - 2:45 PM 
Marrage Farz or Sunat
SALAM
i jst wana no is marriage FARZ(dat u ave 2 do it!) or is it SUNAT(if u do it u get rewrded and if no its not a sin!)
n culd u plz snd me backup
JAZAKALLAH
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atifrafi
PAKISTAN
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 Posted - Thursday, July 29, 2004 - 3:42 PM 
Salaam
I don't think marriage is part of religion. Yes, once someone marry then he/she has some obligation which he/she must follow otherwise Islam doesnot enforce for marriage. What i think that it is Neither Farz nor Sunnah. I believe that this is not part of Deen so there is no concept of reward or sin.
Waslaam |
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murada001
USA
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Posted - Thursday, July 29, 2004 - 3:46 PM
| Marriage in Islam is Sunnah. |
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Zeenaeem
SAUDI ARABIA
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Posted - Thursday, July 29, 2004 - 8:23 PM
And it is He Who has created man from water, and has appointed for him kindred by blood, and kindred by marriage. And your Lord is Ever All-Powerful to do what He will. (Surah Al-Furqan, Chapter-25, Verse-54)
By getting married you are not just getting a wife, you are getting your whole world. From now until the rest of your days your wife will be your partner, your companion, and your best friend.
She will share your moments, your days, and your years. She will share your joys and sorrows, your successes and failures, your dreams and your fears. When you are ill, she will take the best care of you; when you need help, she will do all she can for you; when you have a secret, she will keep it; when you need advice, she will give you the best advice. She will always be with you: when you wake up in the morning the first thing your eyes will see will be her; during the day, she will be with you, if for a moment she is not with you by her physical body, she will be thinking of you, praying for you with all her heart, mind, and soul; when you go to sleep at night, the last thing your eyes will see will be her; and when you are asleep you will still see her in your dreams. In short, she will be your whole world and you will be her whole world.
The best description that I personally have ever read describing the closeness of the spouses to each other is the Quranic verse which says: "they are your garments and you are their garments" Indeed, spouses are like garments to each other because they provide one another with the protection, the comfort, the cover, the support, and the adornment that garments provide to humans. Just imagine a journey in the winter of Alaska without garments! Our spouses provide us with the same level of comfort, protection, cover, and support in the journey of our lives on this earth as garments would do in the Alaska journey.
The relationship between the spouses is the most amazing of all human relations: the amount of love and affection, intimacy and closeness, mercy and compassion, peace and tranquility that fills the hearts of the spouses is simply inexplicable. The only rational explanation for these most amazing of all human feelings is that: it is an act of God. Only God Almighty in His infinite power, boundless mercy, and great wisdom can create and ingrain these amazing feelings in the hearts of the spouses. In fact God is reminding those who search for His signs in the universe that these feelings in the hearts of the spouses are among the signs that should guide humans to His existence as He says in the Quran:
" And among His signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquility with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts: verily in that are signs for those who reflect" (Surah Ar-Rum Chapter-30, Verse-21)
Marriage can only be contracted with the intention of forging a permanent union. Allah calls it a solemn contract, and like all contracts, Muslims are bound by them and are expected to keep them as a basic act of faith. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Of all terms of contract we enter into, there is nothing more worthy of strict observance like those of marriage!” Moreover, marriage in Islam is a noble institution with high noble purposes such as achieving tranquility and peace through a successful union, partnership and companionship, commitment in shouldering the responsibilities of life, and rearing and nurturing of children. It is for this reason that Islam insists that we look for compatibility in spiritual and moral values as the supreme criterion in selecting a marriage partner.
Based on the above considerations, we are not allowed to resort to marriage simply for the purpose of sexual gratification.
The one who gets married is considered “Full Moumin”. Till he gets married, he is not considered so. Since our Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) also married and advocated the institution of marriage, the marriage falls under Sunnah of our Prophet.
Al-Qur’aan speaks about marriage in too many places, and hence urges everyone to get married to be away from sins, and to carry forward the mankind.
Unless someone is medically and physically unfit, marriage has to be solemnized, for the protection of his honour as well as for the protection of society’s honour.
Peace & Marital Smiles
Zeenaeem |
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atifrafi
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Friday, July 30, 2004 - 6:08 AM
Assalam o Alaikum
Thanks for the detailed reply, but still I am not convinced that marriage is something obligatory. The verse 25:54 do tell us that ALLAH Almighty established the relationship of marriage but does not ask or force anyone for marriage.
Brother Zeenaeem spoke about many advantages of marriage like the spouses are like garments for each other, marriage can save one from sins and spouses are best companions and friends. I agree with all of these facts and I also agree that once a person decides to marry than there are so many responsibilities on him/her which they must follow and then those responsibilities are part of religion as the Almighty ALLAH says in the Holy Qur'an in chapter 2 verse 240
"And those of you who die, while leaving their wives behind, should bequeath one year's provisions for their wives [which they should be provided] without turning them out of their houses. However, if they leave their houses [of their own accord], then there is no blame upon you in what they do regarding themselves, according to the custom."
and in some other places where Qur'an speaks about the rights of wife, but still that doesn't means that marriage is compulsory but these are the responsibilities on someone when he/she marries, not before marriage & there is no explicit order in the Qur'an to marry. The Holy Qur'an urges one to marry because this can save him/her from sins but It only "urges" does not order.
In the verse 30:21 the words used are "that you MAY dwell in tranquility with them and He has put love and mercy between your hearts" Now again this isn't an order but again the Qur'an is urging.
quote:
The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Of all terms of contract we enter into, there is nothing more worthy of strict observance like those of marriage!”
This is again when we enter into this contract then there nothing like it but again its not compulsory to enter in this contract.
quote:
Based on the above considerations, we are not allowed to resort to marriage simply for the purpose of sexual gratification.
I have never said that its for the purpose of sexual gratification rather this is one of the most noble relationship between human beings.
quote:
The one who gets married is considered “Full Moumin”. Till he gets married, he is not considered so. Since our Prophet (Sallallahu Alaihi Wasallam) also married and advocated the institution of marriage, the marriage falls under Sunnah of our Prophet.
I really could not understand this point because according to this theory a person to be considered as “Full Moumin” should marry the number of times the Holy Prophet married. ( I think its 9 times, not sure about it ) plus there are many other things which the Holy prophet does but those are noy obligatory for other Muslims just for example the Tahajjud prayer ( Prayer at night ).
About Sunnah, what I believe is something which is part of religion. I don't think that every act of the Prophet is Sunnah.
quote:
Al-Qur’aan speaks about marriage in too many places, and hence urges everyone to get married to be away from sins, and to carry forward the mankind.
You are also saying that Qur'an "urges" everyone. I do agree that one should marry to stay away from sins and to carry forward the mankind. My point is just that its not obligatory and its isn't part of Shariat ( Rules defined by Islam )
I hope that I haven't said anything which hurts someone's feelings, I was just trying to clear my point. If someone has felt something bad I am SORRY for that.
Peace and Smiles
ALLAH Hafiz
Edited by: atifrafi on Friday, July 30, 2004 6:10 AM
Edited by: atifrafi on Friday, July 30, 2004 1:25 PM |
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ibrahim
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Friday, July 30, 2004 - 1:59 PM
Salam to all
I think br atifrafi is right. Marriage is not 100% religious matter in itself though at the same time it cannot be seprated from religion. It is recommended in our religion that One should marry & that will be good for him in many ways. But if someone doesn't marry for any reason BUT remain away from indulging in any wrong & sinful matter despite being Unmarried, It'll not count as a SIN.
regards |
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Zeenaeem
SAUDI ARABIA
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Posted - Friday, July 30, 2004 - 8:10 PM
Dear atirafi
Al-Qur’aan speaks of everything that a man has to accomplish in his life time and restrict himself from such things those are prohibited by Allah. Asceticism and Monasticism is prohibited in Islam. Remaining un-married for want of a proper reason amounts to this sort of practice, which is now refined to say a “Bachelor Life.”
Al-Qur’aan Surah Al-Hadid, Chapter-57, Verse-27 says :
“Then, We sent after them, Our Messengers, and We sent ‘Iesa (Jesus) son of Maryam (Mary), and gave him the Injeel (Gospel). And We ordained in the hearts of those who followed him, compassion and mercy. But the Monasticism which they invented for themselves, We did not prescribe for them, but (they sought it) only to please Allah therewith, but that they did not observe it with the right observance. So We gave those among them who believed, their (due) reward, but many of them are Fasiqun (rebellious, disobedient to Allah).
Dear atifrafi, please note that the Monasticism was not prescribed by Allah for the followers of Jesus but it was their invention. Still they could not follow it. Meaning they had to resort to illegal sexual contacts. Allah says, He gave rewarded the ones who believed – believed in Allah’s command. Hence, from this you will come to know that anyone who fulfills the command of Allah gets rewarded. When marriage is prescribed for the mankind, a person who marries will definitely gets rewards. A person who makes love with this wife is also rewarded, for his going into the right path and abstaining himself from committing sinful acts and illegal contacts with other women.
Moreover, it is clear from the Verse above, that the invention of Monasticism will have no bearing, and the person surely fall prey to Shaitaan. Scientifically speaking, the sex hormones flowing within the body every day will induce everyone to have sexual contact. One CANNOT remain without having sexual intercourse throughout his life, unless he is medically unfit. Such action amounts to sin and to save ourselves from such a sin, marriage is prescribed in Al-Qur’aan. If a healthy bachelor who remains unmarried for no reason tells you that he is sinless and not committed any illegal sexual act, then be sure that he is a liar. See the following verse :
Surah Al-Nisa, Chapter-4, Verse-3 : “And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphangirls, then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (the captives and the salves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice.
The above verse gives you clear command to marry up to four women of your choice or stay with only one. This is the command for everyone to get married.
Allah prescribes things and prohibits several things in several ways. Allah will not prescribe a thing and prohibit a thing in the way you and I want to see and act.
If you still cannot understand and have doubts in your mind, then show me where Allah has not prescribed marriage ? You must point out a verse which commands you explicitly to remain unmarried. OK ?
If a thing is described everywhere in a positive manner, and nowhere it is described in a negative sense, then that thing is prescribed for the mankind. If any supplications (dua) of a Prophet or person are mentioned in Al-Qur’aan it means that those supplications are granted by Allah. If such supplications were not granted, then a rejection message also accompanies the rejected supplication.
Also read the following Hadith from Sahih Bukhari :
Volume 7, Book 62, Number 1:
Narrated Anas bin Malik:
A group of three men came to the houses of the wives of the Prophet asking how the Prophet worshipped (Allah), and when they were informed about that, they considered their worship insufficient and said, "Where are we from the Prophet as his past and future sins have been forgiven." Then one of them said, "I will offer the prayer throughout the night forever." The other said, "I will fast throughout the year and will not break my fast." The third said, "I will keep away from the women and will not marry forever." Allah's Apostle came to them and said, "Are you the same people who said so-and-so? By Allah, I am more submissive to Allah and more afraid of Him than you; yet I fast and break my fast, I do sleep and I also marry women. So he who does not follow my tradition in religion, is not from me (not one of my followers)."
Your quote:
“I really could not understand this point because according to this theory a person to be considered as “Full Moumin” should marry the number of times the Holy Prophet married. ( I think its 9 times, not sure about it ) plus there are many other things which the Holy prophet does but those are noy obligatory for other Muslims just for example the Tahajjud prayer ( Prayer at night ).
About Sunnah, what I believe is something which is part of religion. I don't think that every act of the Prophet is Sunnah.
Unquote
Sunnah means a “rule or way”. Your remaining unmarried is your Sunnah. The regular way of my doing anything is my Sunnah. Like that whatever Prophet (pbuh) did has been his Sunnah. The way Allah commands, give examples etc. are His Sunnah. The multiple marriages of Muslims are curtailed by the Verse-3, of Chapter-4. Even if you marry only one, it is understood that you have followed the way of the Prophet (pbuh). You are allowed to marry maximum 4. If you marry 4, then still you are a follower of Sunnah. If you do not marry, then you are not following the Sunnah of the Prophet and falls outside of his followers as per the Hadith Volume 7, 62-1 of Sahih Bukhari, and several other Ahadiths in that respect.
Praying Tahajjud is not made obligatory. But it is Sunnah., because the Prophet was commanded to pray, he (pbuh) did pray. If you pray Tahajjud, it is Sunnah, and if you do not pray, you will not get that part of reward. There is no obligation.
Remaining unmarried is not a part of Sharia. The Sharia of Islam does not allow a Muslim to remain unmarried, unless and until he is medically and physically unfit. The reason behind it is simple to understand because, you should not fall prey to false ideology of the Westerners, who want to remain unmarried, without any obligation, invite and breed all sort of indecency in the society, thus becoming a reproduction field for several diseases jeopardizing the lives of several others.
Peace & Married Smiles
Zeenaeem |
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murada001
USA
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Posted - Saturday, July 31, 2004 - 5:48 AM
This is the opinion of Sheikh Ahmad Kutty, a senior lecturer and Islamic scholar at the Islamic Institute of Toronto, Ontario, Canada (source: http://www.islam-online.net/fatwa/english/FatwaDisplay.asp?hFatwaID=101037):
“Although marriage is generally considered a highly recommended act, yet from the point of view of fiqh (Islamic jurisprudence)—because of diverse circumstances—it can readily fall into one of the four categories listed below: Fard (obligatory) or mustahabb (recommended) or haram (forbidden) or simply halal (permitted).
1. Marriage is considered fard (obligatory) if a person is so tormented by sexual desire that he/she fears falling into the sin of fornication. Since staying away from fornication is obligatory, and since marriage is the only avenue for legitimate sexual satisfaction, it becomes obligatory on such a person to get married. This is based on the principle in jurisprudence that says: “If an obligatory thing cannot be fulfilled except by fulfilling another, then fulfilling the latter becomes equally obligatory.”
2. If, however, he or she is not so tormented by sexual desire, and, hence, there is no fear of falling into sin, then it is highly recommended to get married if one has the means to do so. By doing so, one is fulfilling one of the great Sunnahs of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him), our perfect role model.
3. If a person knows for certain that he or she cannot fulfill the duties required in marriage, and there is no fear of his/her falling into sin, then it becomes haram for such a person to get married. Islam forbids us from doing injustice to another person; this would definitely be the case if one were to neglect his/her spousal duties.
4. If a person has no means to marry and is, therefore, incapable of fulfilling his spousal duties, but has strong desire, it is permitted for him to get married—provided he tries earnestly to seek an honest source of living. Allah has promised to help such a person. We must also add here a further note that the Muslim community has a duty to assist such people until such time that they become self-reliant.
If, however, no such measures are available, and a person finds himself unable to fulfill his spousal duties, he is advised to curb his desires through the discipline of fasting and other acts of sublimation.” |
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Zeenaeem
SAUDI ARABIA
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Posted - Saturday, July 31, 2004 - 7:46 AM
Dear Murada001
Thanks for the Fatwa posting regarding marriage.
It has become a trend now in Western countries to destroy the institution of marriage and run away from the family responsibilities. They enjoy their life to the fullest extent indulging in haraam activities. On seeing their life-style, our Muslim youth too falling prey to their practices, unknowing that such persons, mostly commit suicide when they become tired of working, say at the age of 60+, or taking shelter in oldage homes, having no families to take care of them.
Some misguided people give wrong advices and remain satisfied with what they uttered. They ruin themselves as well as destroy the desires of others to do any noble cause. |
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atifrafi
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, July 31, 2004 - 10:18 AM
Assalam o Alaikum
Brother Zeenaeem, you quoted the verse 57:27. In this verse it is written that "....So We gave those among them who believed, their (due) reward..." now this means that if someone can save himself from sins then he will get reward ???? I don't think so but according to your logic this verse means same. ALLAH gave reward to those who believed, means who were practicing it in a right way...... all other who didnot practiced in a right way were also believers in ALLAH.
The verse Surah Al-Nisa, Chapter-4, Verse-3: does not deals with the permission of marriages or denial of marriages. This verse totally deals with the fact that to deal justly with the orphangirls, you can marry more than once ( as it was the normal practice of the Arabs ) and they were advised that you do marry more than once in your normal routine so its better that to take care of the orphangirls you marry with their mothers. This is no general directive to marry ( either once or more than once )
This verse is very obvious that its talking about the care of orphangirls and for that one can marry more than once.
I cannot point out a verse which commands you explicitly to remain unmarried..... because ALLAH has left this on human beings moreover if ALLAH had given some command then no man could marry which is totally against the human nature & Islam is nothing against the nature.
I think u have totally misunderstood me, please make one thing very clear that I am not saying that one should not marry rather its better as it can save you from sins.
But on the other hand, is it 100% true that a married person will not indulge in sins ????
My point is that ite better but its not compulsory and I gave u the example of the prayer at night. That is also better but not compulsory.
Our beloved Prophet (peace be upon him) said that Muslims should consider this prayer as obligatory .... Now this doesn't means that its obligatory rathar this is to emphasize on the importance of the prayer. Same is the case hare, all the verses and Hadith you have quoted shows the importance of marriage but does not cammand it as obligatory.
I hope i have cleared my point.
Regards |
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Zeenaeem
SAUDI ARABIA
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Posted - Tuesday, August 3, 2004 - 8:02 AM
Dear Atifrafi
It is good that you are thinking and trying to understand the verses of Al-Qur’aan in a different way. While doing so, one should not have pre-concluded notion in his heart. Else the whole essence of the message will get lost and he will be under the wrong impression that he found the truth. Let us pray Allah for guiding us to the proper path with better understanding of His message.
Your quote:
“Brother Zeenaeem, you quoted the verse 57:27. In this verse it is written that "....So We gave those among them who believed, their (due) reward..." now this means that if someone can save himself from sins then he will get reward ???? I don't think so but according to your logic this verse means same. ALLAH gave reward to those who believed, means who were practicing it in a right way...... all other who didnot practiced in a right way were also believers in ALLAH.
Unquote
Your question is if someone can save himself from sins then will he get reward? The answer is yes. It is yes because he obeys the order to save himself from sins. It is yes because he obeys the command by Allah to do the right thing. The Ajr-o-Thawab (Reward) Allah gives is tremendous. You do not have to think negatively, having doubts in your mind. In your next sentence, you said, “who did not practiced in a right way were also believers in Allah.” Allah says he rewarded those who believed. That means, the persons who assumed Monasticism of their own, without prescription by Allah and also not practicing the same properly are not coming under the category of believers. Otherwise, Allah would not have said that He did not prescribe Monasticism. It was an innovation in the Deen of Allah, which has never been acceptable to Allah. Hence, they are not coming under the category of believers. When a practice is invented by people of their own saying that it is from Allah that means they are lying taking Allah’s name. In such case they are considered the most Zalimun of the people and will be punished by Allah. If Allah had accepted Monasticism, He would have told that those who practiced Monasticism were rewarded. In that case, the Monasticism could have been taken as prescribed and accepted by Allah. But Allah’s Sunnah has never been in support of Monasticism or Asceticism or Bachelor life. Allah married off Adam and Eve in Paradise. Allah will give the Hoor-Ain in marriage to the believers in Paradise.
Here there is one more thing to note. “Those who did not practice the self-inflicted Monasticism” were committing illegal sexual acts, a capital crime. Had these people been marrying properly, they would not have fallen under the category of the people who practiced Monasticism without prescription by Allah. And in that case, such people could have been considered as believers, who followed the instructions of Allah by duly marrying. They would not, however, fall under the category of the people who did not follow Monasticism “properly”.
To put in a nutshell, we have seen and discussed above three categories of people :
1. Married – Always rewarded by Allah for obeying his command and abstaining from sinning
2. Monastic – Self imposed cruelty taking Allah’s name. (Liars and Innovators. They are to be punished)
3. Improper Monastic – Those who indulged in illegal sexual acts. These are the people who were sinning most by :
i. Cheating the public, saying that they are dedicated to God
ii. Indulging in illegal sexual acts
iii. Lying to the public.
iv. Robbing the honor and dignity of women, stealthily
vi. Desecrating the houses of Allah (Churches)
You know, when the industrial revolution took place in the Western countries, several churches were razed to build industries. On digging there for laying foundations, several sites of the churches had skulls and bones of small children. They were of the bones of children born to the fathers (and nuns) of the churches and murdered and buried within the church compounds !! then, add below :
vii. Murdering a child
viii. Burying the child without proper procedure and information to the authorities
ix Holding the women (nuns) as hostages in the church and blackmailing them
x. Spoiling the life of the women (nuns)
xi. Not allowing them to get married and settled.
x. Repetition of Adultery, without repenting.
I hope, now it is clear to you.
I will deal separately the other part of your write-up.
Peace & Un-innovated Smiles
Zeenaeem |
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atifrafi
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Tuesday, August 3, 2004 - 9:00 AM
Dear Zeenaeem
Let's re-examine the verse:
057.027 Then, in their wake, We followed them up with (others of) Our messengers: We sent after them Jesus the son of Mary, and bestowed on him the Gospel; and We ordained in the hearts of those who followed him Compassion and Mercy. But the Monasticism which they invented for themselves, We did not prescribe for them: (We commanded) only the seeking for the Good Pleasure of Allah; but that they did not foster as they should have done. Yet We bestowed, on those among them who believed, their (due) reward, but many of them are rebellious transgressors.
Now, its written that "..... Yet We bestowed, on those among them who believed " The words YET WE BESTOWED means that ALLAH bestowed those who invented Monasticism and then fulfill its requirements and does not indulge in sins otherwise it should be that "WE BESTOWED ONLY THOSE WHO DID NOT PARTICIPATE IN MONASTICISM".
But I think that we are moving away from our discussion, to define that we can do something new or not is another debatable topic and we wish to talk on that I think it would be better to start a seperate thread. Here we are talking about the obligatory status of marriage. So for all of your discussion is based on ONE thing that it can save a person from great sins.
I totally agree with u that it CAN save but do remember that it "CAN" save. There is no hard and fast rule that a married person will not indulge in any sin and on the other hand a person who is NOT married there is again no hard and fast rule that He/She WILL INDULGE IN SINS.
I agree with all of the data that u have provided but can u guarantee me that a married person will not do all that ?? There are several examples in our daily life where married persons are committing such sins.
Your Quote
==========
1. Married – Always rewarded by Allah for obeying his command and abstaining from sinning
Unquote
=======
Can you guarantee that if I marry to someone I'll be rewarded by ALLAH, no matter what i do after marriage with my wife and outside world.
Even if I say that a person will not commit any sin but still to marry someone puts a lots of responsibilitoes on you and if you fail to fulfill your responsibilities even then I am sure that the person will not be rewarded by ALLAH rather he will be punished. Its not that u have a Nikah ( marriage ) with someone and thats all, by doing so u always accept a lot of responsibilities which are to be fulfilled otherwise you are again comitting sins.
You wrote that a married person obeys ALLAH's commands, can u please show any single verse from the Holy Qur'an ordering people to marry. Please only quote any explicit order because by applying the policy that " it is written and if that means this then this is also proved" one can prove anything even if that is against the Holy Qur'an. I am not saying that u r quoting something against the Qur'an but still there is no explicit order to marry. If there is some order please do tell me.
Peace. |
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Zeenaeem
SAUDI ARABIA
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Posted - Tuesday, August 3, 2004 - 10:02 AM
Dear Atifrafi
Now let me deal with your confusion about orphans and marriage.
Your quote :
“The verse Surah Al-Nisa, Chapter-4, Verse-3: does not deals with the permission of marriages or denial of marriages. This verse totally deals with the fact that to deal justly with the orphangirls, you can marry more than once ( as it was the normal practice of the Arabs ) and they were advised that you do marry more than once in your normal routine so its better that to take care of the orphangirls you marry with their mothers. This is no general directive to marry ( either once or more than once )
This verse is very obvious that its talking about the care of orphangirls and for that one can marry more than once.”
Unquote
You are contradicting in your comments saying that the verse “does not deal with permission of marriages…” and then in the second sentence, saying that “to deal justly with the orphangirls, you can marry more than once….”
To clear away your confusion, let us analyze the situation :
Surah Al-Nisa, revealed in Madinah. The instructions about the division of inheritance of the martyrs and for the safeguard of the rights of the orphans were sent down after the Battle of Uhud in which 70 Muslims were killed. Then naturally the question of the division of the inheritance of the martyrs and the safeguard of the rights of their orphans arose in many families at Al-Madinah. For that reason, Verses 1-28 were revealed on that occasion.
Prophet Muhammad engaged in bringing about an all round development of the Islamic Community that had been formed at the time of his migration to Al-Madinah. For this purpose he was introducing new moral, cultural, social, economic and political ways in place of the old ones of the pre-Islamic period. By him principles for the smooth running of family life have been laid down and ways of settling family disputes have been taught. Rules have been prescribed for marriage and rights of wife and husband have been apportioned fairly and equitably. The status of women in the society has been determined and the declaration of the rights of orphans has been made law and regulations have been laid down for the division of inheritance, and the instructions have been given to reform economic affairs. The foundation of penal code has been laid down, drinking has been prohibited, and instructions have been given for cleanliness and purity. The Muslims have been taught the kind of relations good men should have with their Allah and fellow men. Instructions have been given for the maintenance of discipline in the Muslim Community.
Hence your assumption that the Verse-3 of Surah An-Nisa “does not deal with the permission of marriage or denial of marriages…” is not correct. This verse does deal with the permission of marriage and limits the number of wives one can have. What if anyone can deal justly with the orphans and desires to marry more than one ? He can, of course. Let us analyze the situation :
Orphans means:
1. Children (male and female) having no parents (Both, father and mother)
2. Children (male and female) having no father. (Only mother is available)
3. Single child (male or female) having no parents (Both, father and mother)
4. Single child (male or female) having no father (Only mother is available)
In case if a man has been allotted with an orphan child (male only) His father’s property along with his mother comes under him. This man can marry the woman. Like that he can marry four women having their own children, doing proper justice with each one’s property. He should not marry with the intention of inheriting the orphan’s property. Simply keeping the child in his guardianship is not the intention. But giving the widow a purposeful life, apart from making a guardian to the orphan is the noble intention.
In case if a man has been allotted with an orphan (female), along with her mother, he can marry either of the one, the child (if she is of marriageable age) or the mother. He cannot marry both. It is prohibited in Verse-23. Nor he can marry more than one female child of the same mother. They are sisters and hence prohibited. Here too, marriage is the intention, though orphanage has been taken care of.
In other words, marriage is the way to deal the problem of orphanage, thus providing the family a surrounding of love, care and safety. Marriage is the solution to offer the hapless family with a bread-winner. Marriage bring them back to the right track of life, providing them with every comfort, social security and protect them from falling into any sinful act.
What about orphans without any property at all ? Can’t they be married because of having no property to share ? Hence, it is logical to think that a man could marry different orphan women (up to 4) having no property at all.
If anyone fears of committing injustice with orphan, then he is free to marry other women of his choice, up to 4. Here again, Allah did not say not to marry, but He says, you can marry.
Hence, the verse 4:3 contains the command to marry, either orphans if you could do justice, or other women if you fear that you cannot make justice between orphan’s properties.
You agreed that you couldn’t show a verse commanding us to remain unmarried. Whereas there are plenty of verses available in support of marriage, urging, stressing and commanding. Hence, marriage falls under Fardh and Sunnah.
And the hadith makes it specific that the one who remains unmarried (under normal conditions) is NOT from our Prophet (peace be upon him) – Meaning, not following Sunnah and hence, not from Muslims’ community.
You have to get married, at least once, in your lifetime.
I hope now it is clear to you.
Peace & Re-marrying Smiles
Zeenaeem |
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atifrafi
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Tuesday, August 3, 2004 - 12:43 PM
Dear Zeenaeem
You have again misunderstood me. I said that the verse does not deal with the permission or denial of marriage in general circumstances ( normal condition). You have given a detailed description of the verse and I was also talking in respect of the same background.
I am totally unable to understand that how u can obtain an order of marriage from the verse 4:3. There it is written that :
"And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphangirls, then marry (other) women of your choice" Its clearly written that "if u fear" then u can marry more than once. Now HOW THIS VERSE ORDERS OR EVEN GIVES PERMISSION FOR MORE THAN ONE MARRIAGES, i am totally unable to understand that. On the other hand, I am not saying that it stops someone from marrying , once or more.
It was a normal routine in Arabs that they marry more than once, even they still do the same. The Almighty ALLAH urges people that u already marry more than once So it would be better that if u fear that u cannot take good care of the orphans, u "can" marry to their mother.
Its is crystal clear that if u fear that ........ , THEN MARRY OTHER WOMEN OF YOUR CHOICE.
Its very simple, written in IF statement, which clearly means that you can marry if u have some fear/doubts about dealing with orphans justly. There is no general permission even, rather than an order.
When i say that it does not deal with the permission or denial of marriages, that is in normal circumstances. In that special circumstance it urges ppl to marry, even then it does not orders & even it is not a privelage that one can marry if he wants to without fulfilling the requirements of the marriage.
The very next verse states :
004.004 And give the women (on marriage) their dower as a free gift; but if they, of their own good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, Take it and enjoy it with right good cheer.
This verse clearly states then it is not a privelage that for orphans you marry someone, even if u marry for the orphans, even then u have to give the women their dower.
So, even if in this case it is not a privelage, then how can u say that in normal circumstances it is allowed. Now, I doesn't means that it is forbidden but it is left on the society and choice of people, they can if they want to and if they can fulfill all the requirements.
Your Quote
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This verse does deal with the permission of marriage and limits the number of wives one can have. What if anyone can deal justly with the orphans and desires to marry more than one ? He can, of course. Let us analyze the situation :
Answer
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This verse gives you permission in a special case, i.e. to deal justly with the orphans. In normal circumstances., The Holy Qura'n neither stops u from marrying nor orders anyone to marry. If a person can marry or not, without this special case, u said he can marry, i too agree with u but still He CAN, its not obligatory.
Your Quote
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If anyone fears of committing injustice with orphan, then he is free to marry other women of his choice, up to 4. Here again, Allah did not say not to marry, but He says, you can marry.
Answer
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I am also saying the same, ALLAH says u can marry, and what is the meaning of "CAN", it means that "if u want to" ALLAH doesn't say that U HAVE TO MARRY. Not even at a single place in the Holy Qur'an.
Your Quote
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Hence, the verse 4:3 contains the command to marry, either orphans if you could do justice, or other women if you fear that you cannot make justice between orphan’s properties.
Answer
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I am sorry to say but I could not see any command here. It is just giving an option that its better. Be very clear about my words, "Its Better" in comparison that u try to take care of orphans but its natural that if there is a dispute between ur own child and the orphan a person will always take side of your own child. So thats y ALLAH said that its BETTER that u marry with their mother and that is also only if u fear that u will not be able to deal with them justly
Your Quote
==========
You agreed that you couldn’t show a verse commanding us to remain unmarried. Whereas there are plenty of verses available in support of marriage, urging, stressing and commanding. Hence, marriage falls under Fardh and Sunnah.
Answer
======
There are verses in support of marriage, urging & stressing and I also said that its better but there is NO SINGLE VERSE EVEN which commands you to marry, atleast I haven't seen any. If there is any then please do let me know.
Please only the verse where a command is given because I do agree about the verses which are in support of marriage and it will be only waste of ur efforts and time if you again quote such verses.
About the Hadith, u said under normal condition, so what are abnormal condition, only medical fitness is enough for Normal condition. I don't think so. If a person cannot fulfill his duties which are posed onto him even then that is not a normal case.
Peace & Smiles
Atif. |
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Zeenaeem
SAUDI ARABIA
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Posted - Tuesday, August 3, 2004 - 1:17 PM
Dear Atifrafi
Thanks for your prompt attention. Let me clarify you the verse quoted - 57:27. You have quoted a different translation where you have said within brackets to mean that as if Allah has recommended Monasticism, which is not at all correct but goes against the principle of Allah Who stated that “We did not prescribe for them..” Nor Monasticism was prescribed to anyone else in this world, prior to Eisa (peace be upon him). Hence, the word yet (meaning up till now, hitherto, however, nevertheless, nonetheless etc.) is not suitable translation because the Arabic world “Fa” suffixing “aathainallazeena aamanoo” only suggest a reward for the action they have done – that is those who “Believed”. Hence “so We gave those among…” is correct. Then, let us see they Believed what ? They believed in Allah, they believed in Jesus, they believe in all that Allah has ordained. Since Monasticism was not ordained, they did not believe. Such people are the Fasiqun, rebellious, disobedient to Allah.
When Allah has not prescribed Monasticism, and it was invented, that is how the Christians also assumed that Allah will bestow His rewards due to their action. In the same line of such Fasiqun, you are also translating the verse saying Allah bestowed his reward on the inventors of Monasticism?!! ASTAGFIRULLAH. Allah says He did not prescribe. You are saying Allah bestowed reward on such people !! The phrase you have quoted “otherwise it should be that "WE BESTOWED ONLY THOSE WHO DID NOT PARTICIPATE IN MONASTICISM". – is included in the phrase “fa aathainallazeena aamanoo (So we gave those who believed).
Your quote:
“I totally agree with u that it CAN save but do remember that it "CAN" save. There is no hard and fast rule that a married person will not indulge in any sin and on the other hand a person who is NOT married there is again no hard and fast rule that He/She WILL INDULGE IN SINS.
Unquote
I did not say nor anyone said that a married person indulges in sins. If you talk about ordinary sins of a married person, the full mankind is sinning. When you talk about the sin “Adultery” the illegal sexual intercourse, yes, marriage is a way to be out of such a grave sin. Of course, there is a hard and fast rule in Islam for the married persons as well as for the unmarried persons NOT to indulge in illegal sexual intercourse. It is haraam and Punishment for such an act is prescribed. See Chapter-7:33, 16:90, 17:32, punishment prescribed in 24:2, 24:19, 25:68, 53:32.
In order to save himself from Adulteration sin, a man has been ordained to go for polygamy –(more than one wife). If he commits such sins, he will be punished unless he made a Tauba (repentance) before his death.
If a person man or woman remains unmarried, he or she will SURELY commit sin. If someone says you that he or she is sinless, that person has to be a LIAR. Scientifically it is impossible for a healthy person to remain without indulging in sexual activity, throughout his/her life. This is guaranteed by the science.
Your quote :
“Can you guarantee that if I marry to someone I'll be rewarded by ALLAH, no matter what i do after marriage with my wife and outside world.”
Unquote
I can guarantee you Allah’s reward if you remain without sinning after your marriage.
Why should I or anyone guarantee a sinner who does all the ‘haraam’ things outside of his marriage ? You will bear your sins, I will bear my sins. We are not responsible for each other’s sins. Right? If you choose to sin after your marriage, then go ahead, but do not forget to do Tauba (repentance) before you death. Insha Allah, you will forgiven.
Your quote :
“Even if I say that a person will not commit any sin but still to marry someone puts a lots of responsibilitoes on you and if you fail to fulfill your responsibilities even then I am sure that the person will not be rewarded by ALLAH rather he will be punished. Its not that u have a Nikah ( marriage ) with someone and thats all, by doing so u always accept a lot of responsibilities which are to be fulfilled otherwise you are again comitting sins.
Unquote
Dear Atifrafi, you have already put a condition saying “if”. I mean you said “if you fail to fulfill your responsibilities….” I am asking you, why should I fail in my responsibilities as a married man ? What makes you to assume things on your own about me or about anyone else ? Do you think, everyone on this earth, including yourself, failed in their duties, as married men ? If you think so, you are an ignorant. You do not know me and my responsibilities and hence cannot assume as you like.
And I am sure, not only me, everyone who has married duly accepting Allah’s command will be rewarded for that part of his responsibility. If he does anything extra marital illegal activity, then the question of punishment comes. Man is sinner. His nature is sinning. There is always a way to remit your sins by Tauba.
All the married men and women know their responsibilities well, and all are fulfilling them with fear and Eimaan, and also look forward for the great reward from Allah.
To the seeker of Truth, the level of understanding varies person to person. To us whatever is explicit order from Allah, may not be explicit for you. We see orders to marry in several places. You can re-read and re-read to understand the order of Allah in Verse 4:3, and the intensity of the Hadith, I have already quoted.
You can also read 4:23 & 24 to see the eligible women to be married, along with forbidden. All these are explicit commands from Allah to marry among the women who are made halaal.
May Allah open your intelligence to see the proper meaning of His Message. Ameen.
Peace & Responsible Smiles
Zeenaeem |
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Zeenaeem
SAUDI ARABIA
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Posted - Tuesday, August 3, 2004 - 9:06 PM
Dear Atif
I hope you are just trying to play around the words of English, taking support of “Have”, Can” and “May”. These are the words supportive to you to understand the Divine message that was revealed in Arabic. If you read the Arabic Verse, there is no need for you to find, “Can Marry ” to mean other than “Have To Marry”. The Arabic word “Fankihu” does not mean as you assume. "Fankihu" stand for "so marry" or "then marry" All verses of Al-Qur’aan are commands from Allah to follow. You cannot wishfully accept anything of your choice and reject anything seems inconvenient to you. In that case, beware of your falling under hypocrisy and going close to apostasy.
May be it is waste of time for you. But I do not consider this clarifying procedure as a waste of time because the name of this site is “Studying-Islam”. Do not think that you and me only reading and writing here. It is an open forum for all. If a non-Muslim happens to come here to study Islam and if he happens to read from you he will think that Muslims are marrying without the command of Allah, yet claiming that Al-Qur’aan is complete in all respects. Do you know the impact of damage you are doing, with your scanty knowledge of translation? In order not to rest your questions unanswered, I have to tackle you with the Truth of Al-Qur’aan. Even after seeing the Fatwa posted by a member, you are blind to accept the command of Al-Qur’aan !! Do you think the Fatwa is just issued to please the people ? Your question is not a new one. I have seen questions more serious than this and have successfully clarified and argued months together with Christian Missionaries, on a single point. Here personal ego will not benefit you anything.
Don’t be adamant to understand and contradict in each and every paragraph saying that you agree with some and you will not agree with some. For such people there is another command, which I may post in my forthcoming dialogue with you. Taking “IF” statement you are trying to mislead the readers. See your confusion below :
Your quote:
“"And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphangirls, then marry (other) women of your choice" Its clearly written that "if u fear" then u can marry more than once. Now HOW THIS VERSE ORDERS OR EVEN GIVES PERMISSION FOR MORE THAN ONE MARRIAGES, i am totally unable to understand that. On the other hand, I am not saying that it stops someone from marrying , once or more.”
Unquote
When you questioned saying “Now HOW THIS VERSE ORDERS OR EVEN GIVES PERMISSION FOR MORE THAN ONE MARRIAGES, …” in the last sentence you said “ I am not saying that it stops someone from marrying, once or more.”
Due to the War the orphans were distributed among Muslims and they got married as per the command more than once up to 4. As you assumed, if there was no clear cut order for these things, Allah would have revealed a Verse forbidding everyone to get married and Prophet (peace be upon him) would have stopped them. Then you will say, it is against nature and Allah will not stop. That is why he commanded in Arabic (not English or other language to play with words for people like you). The language used was Arabic and there are command in the verses.
In case if there are no orphans involved then too the command to marry fits, in so many verses. You can read Verses – 3 to 28 wherein as I said earlier, these are the commands, making the rules and regulations for Islamic state and a moral behaviour of Muslims. You are attacking the very foundation of the Institution of Marriage in Islam, through which everyone’s life is shaped. Your doubts and questions belong to anti-Islamic sites. The Christian Missionary has posed hundreds of questions and doubts and this is one among those.
Running away from responsibilities of marriage is a new concept of the misguided youth of Western countries, to which you have also fallen prey to justify (yours ?) bachelorship. It is haraam. This amounts to Monasticism and fall of morals and humanity. The gay people also are justifying that there is no specific command for them not to marry. So they are marrying. All sort of evil practice erupt from your sort of reading and wrong interpretation of the verse of Al-Qur’aan.
Dear Atif, in all the verses wherever you find the word “fankihu”, it means clearly an order, a command, which you have to obey. Do not try to translate in any language of your choice to justify your assumptions. If you obey you will be rewarded. If you do not obey, you will remain a Rejecter of Allah’s command and will definitely be punished for your disobedience. Please note that you CANNOT stay a bachelor life-long, without sinning, without committing an illegal sexual act.
In order to understand the Divine Message exactly Ulemas always maintain and suggest to read the Qur’aan in its original language, rather than in any ones own, if someone wants to minutely analyze the truth of Islam.
If someone argues that there is no command to eat Rice or Chapati in Al-Qur’aan what you will say about that man. If someone says, there is no command to sleep, how would you call that man. If a nudist argue that there is no command to dress, how will you justify. Does Allah say you to eat mangoes ? He makes fruits, vegetables and other eatables halaal. And forbids few things haraam. You cannot argue taking each and every thing in your hand and ask this is not made halaal. There are people who argue saying that there is no command of 5 times Salah. This is because of lack of proper understanding of the verses.
Let me make you understand the verse – 4:3 :
“And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphangirls, then marry (other) women of your choice, two or three, or four but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (the captives and the slaves) that your right hands possess. That is nearer to prevent you from doing injustice.”
Regarding your point of “If you fear” referred to in your write-up, please note that the word “if” goes with fear only. Not with anything else. If you do not fear, then you marry them. Somewhere you have assumed that Allah has told to marry their mother.
Your quote :
“I am sorry to say but I could not see any command here. It is just giving an option that its better. Be very clear about my words, "Its Better" in comparison that u try to take care of orphans but its natural that if there is a dispute between ur own child and the orphan a person will always take side of your own child. So thats y ALLAH said that its BETTER that u marry with their mother and that is also only if u fear that u will not be able to deal with them justly”
Unquote
The words you have written “Its Better” etc. are only your assumption and translation. Allah did not say to marry their mother. It is also your assumption. Allah says “marry other women” not mothers, as you have assumed.
Your quote :
“About the Hadith, u said under normal condition, so what are abnormal condition, only medical fitness is enough for Normal condition. I don't think so. If a person cannot fulfill his duties which are posed onto him even then that is not a normal case.
Unquote
The abnormal condition you ask is other than the normal condition. That is to say that you are medically unfit. Or to say that though you are medically fit to marry, you do not have hands to clean yourself. Because of that no woman comes forward to marry you. Or in case of your having any Acquired disease, or infection which is feared to be spreading from you, say leprosy like diseases, etc. are abnormal conditions.
Poverty is not considered a cause of remaining unmarried. You can go for still poorer people to marry without any expenses. Allah is the one who gives you Rizk. When He places another soul in your care, He will surely open new gates for you. I have seen hundreds of people, getting better after their marriage, including myself.
Please read Chapter-4, Verse-25 : “And whoever of you have not the means wherewith to wed free, believing women, they may wed believing girls from among those (captives and slaves) whom your right hands possess, and Allah has full knowledge about your Faith, you are one from another. Wed them with the permission of their own folk (guardians, Auliya’ or masters) and give them their Mahr according to what is reasonable; they (the above said captive and slave-girls) should be chaste, not adulterious, nor taking boy-friends…..”
Dear Atifrafi, you have to marry if you are beyond any abnormal condition, described above. There is no escape.
If you chose to discuss further, most welcome.
Peace & Normalized Smiles
Zeenaeem |
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