| Author | Topic |
oosman
USA
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 Posted - Monday, July 25, 2005 - 1:57 PM 
To Mr loveall.
Kindly quote a verse from Quran majeed where Allah orders us to OBEY our parents. The vereses you quoted, Allah orders us to be kind to them and say good words, it does not say to obey them all the time!
There is a difference between obeying them and being kind to them. Please do not put your own words into the Quran majeed, and consult an Aalim on this matter.
Have a good day.
Jazakallah khair. |
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Loveall
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Wednesday, July 27, 2005 - 1:02 AM
In the name of Allah, the Beneficent, the Merciful.
My point of view does not mean that the parents must not be convinced or taken into the confidence. But it must always be tried to convince them and even some other people may be brought to do so, if our decision is right. But what should be done if they (parents) DON’T AT ALL agree. In this situation of disagreement of the parents, No option other than to chide or confront them seems to be there. And does Islam allow confronting them and becoming the rebellious? This is the only what I mean.
We must not forget, in the coming time, we will also be the parents. Would we like to be chided and confronted by those whom we call the lobes of our liver? Think for a while otherwise the time and tide wait for none.
The Parents must also think positively.
Oosman, mostly you say everywhere, “nowhere it is written” So the lamb understanding of such people is like those who say for example, “One is allowed to break the arms and legs of someone with foot because foot is not explicitly mentioned in the Shariah but with one’s hands and tongue one must not hurt others. Isn’t it?
By the way, those who consider them very much wise to select their life partner and after the marriage why they (MALES) are in search of finding the FALSE WAY of doing second, third and the fourth marriage? Why do they become not happy with that guy for whom MAY have chided and confronted their parents and earned the anger of God? This may happen after selection by the parents but achieving the pleasure of God must be at the top priority not our personal desires and the benefits. This is one of the examples of Taqwa (piety) especially for those who consider themselves Loving/Caring and committed to God and raise the tympanic slogans in the air NOTHING ELSE………..
In short and summarizing the all, it must always be tried to convince the parents but if they (parents) do not at all agree, what must be done? Should one confront them and become the rebellious. What does Islam say in case of disagreement of the parents? This is the only what I mean. In this case, to me, one has no option other than to submit to the parents for their as well as God’s pleasure and with the passage of time all the problems may be solved OTHERWISE those who are not good to their parents, in any aspect, they eat shoes in this world. |
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Loveall
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Wednesday, July 27, 2005 - 1:40 AM
To Oosman
Answer to your question
See in capital words of the verse
And We have enjoined on man goodness to his parents, and IF THEY CONTEND with you that you should associate (others) with Me, of which you have no knowledge, DO NOT OBEY THEM, to Me is your return, so I will inform you of what you did (29: 8).
Means if no Shirk then obey.
QUOTE: Please do not put your own words into the Quran majeed, and consult an Aalim.
I am not putting but you are trying to find the false way for your own benefits. Mind it. What Aalim like you?
Mostly you say everywhere, “nowhere it is written” So the lamb understanding of such people is like those who say for example, “One is allowed to break the arms and legs of someone with foot because foot is not explicitly mentioned in the Shariah but with one’s hands and tongue one must not hurt others. Isn’t it?
Edited by: Loveall on Wednesday, July 27, 2005 1:52 AM |
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oosman
USA
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Posted - Wednesday, July 27, 2005 - 2:24 AM
Dear Mr Loveall,
Please do not get angry. I am trying to show you your argument is very wrong in the light of holy Quran. Please bear with me, I will clarify, inshallah.
First I will say that I do agree with you that we should always be polite towards parents and speak nice, kind words to them.
Now the disagreement between us is this:
You say we should obey them if there is disagreement and they do not agree with us. (I am not talking about shirk).
I say we do not have to obey them in certain situations (not talking about shirk again).
For example, if my father asks me to murder an innocent man, I will not obey my father. Even though this is not shirk, I am justified in disobeying my father. Because Allah threatens in the Quran anyone who intentionally kills a Momin will live in hell forever, it is in Sura Nisaa. So I will prefer disobeying my parents to living in Hell for eternity.
According to your logic, a child must still obey!
You quoted the holy verse:
And We have enjoined on man goodness to his parents, and IF THEY CONTEND with you that you should associate (others) with Me, of which you have no knowledge, DO NOT OBEY THEM, to Me is your return, so I will inform you of what you did (29: 8).
Then You said:
'Means if no Shirk then obey.'
Dear Sir, it does not mean 'no shirk then obey', but it means 'if shirk then don't obey'. There is a clear difference in what you have interpretted wrongly and what the verse is saying.
Allah is saying if parents ask you to do shirk, then do not obey parents. Only for this condition Allah has given this order. There is no order from Allah about other possible contentions that might arise between you and your parents. In all other cases one must again consult the holy Quran, the Sunnah, and use one's best intellectual capabilities that Allah has bestowed us. So if you parents ask you to kill someone unjustly, or to steal something, then please disobey your parents! But always be polite and kind to them.
May Allah guide us all. |
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gohar
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Wednesday, July 27, 2005 - 3:03 PM
...and if they contend with you that you should associate (others) with Me, of which you have no knowledge... (29: 8)
when u associate anything with ur Creator what does that mean?
Does that not mean that you believing in some other source for ur benifts and miseries?
Now in how many shapes is it possible in todays world?
When parents force you to marry:
1. in wealthy family guy/girl---- false belief in wealth-- fear of poverty---no beief in one own efforts--inturn no belief in Allah help to the ones who struggle--greediness.
2. in their family--- false belief in group and family support--no belief in Allah rather fear of family and humans to get their support---fear of inner complexes--could also be greediness of property.
3. in the same ethnic group--- false belief in ethinicity, racism.
3. in a powerful poilitical or authoritative family----again no belief in the power of Allah.
Its very unlikely that parents may ask you to go and pray to idol or change ur religion, though they may ask you not change ur religion whatever it is.
To associate anything with God of which one has no knowledge is of anything or act which God orders or allows you to do otherwise or God has not ordered of that.
Edited by: gohar on Wednesday, July 27, 2005 3:05 PM |
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Loveall
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Sunday, July 31, 2005 - 6:22 AM
| Wait for the day when you will receive just a message on your mobile phone, “Hello! Mr. Dad/mom I have married” |
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Loveall
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Sunday, July 31, 2005 - 6:40 AM
| gohar ,IMPROVE YOU LAMB UNDERUNDERSTANDING, SHIRK IS NOT JUST TO WORSHIP IDOLS BUT YOUR EATING AND DRINKING MAY ALSO BE SHIRK. |
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gohar
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Monday, August 1, 2005 - 6:43 AM
Loveall,
The problem is that either you never bother or does not want to read, understand others point of view.
Ofcourse I say the same thing that SHIRK is not just praying rituals to idols.
To my understanding it is to attribute Rabubiyath to someone/something else.
There is no point discussing those who do it intentionaly,
but there are forms of doing it unintentionaly, one of its form is as parents taking Rabubiyath of their children?
in the way that you consider,
1. No safety or security for children apart from yourself.... disbleief in Allah.
2. To maintain power and hold in society and group by making a strong children bond..... Power belongs only to Allah.
The pyschology of Fear, selfishness hopelessness in parents when they force children according to their wishes. Its not what Muslim Like and has got social repurcussions too.
1. Hopelessness in life without children... hopelessness itself is disbelief.
3. Fear of misries of life without children... disbelief in humanity.
4. Imposition of group/ family/ ethnic rules on individual.... which is against the norm of larger independence of individual and brotherhood of Islam.
5. Expect betterment in their life only from their children... shows and develops hostility towards other children, develops inability to do any social betterment in larger interest.
man the list goes on and on and i have hundred points in here to give but i would say one simple thing to conclude..
It is advised children to care for their parents but it is never ordered parents to enforce on their children.
Edited by: gohar on Monday, August 01, 2005 6:45 AM |
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Bhavittre
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, August 20, 2005 - 8:30 PM
| those who are disobedient and chide the parents they really eat shoes…… |
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gohar
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, August 20, 2005 - 10:46 PM
| So do you mean not to disobey parents or say upright in any situation with them? |
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gohar
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Tuesday, August 23, 2005 - 1:23 AM
its not just a denial, the search comes after it.
change ur position u may be able to see something else, not necessarily the already seen ones.
its frustrating you, dear. |
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Bhavittre
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Tuesday, August 23, 2005 - 1:55 AM
i have visited many countries. i met one of the social workers who told me…….
women are very calm and quite by nature. most of them are not bothered about their status because they consider them no doubt of high status of every kind. but some women who are deprived due to some social reasons like being beaten badly by their husbands, being divorced repeatedly, or being tortured by different ways or rejcted by the society etc come out of their homes and represent the whole women community. socially sound women dislike such movements. these women use islam becuz there is some relaxation for them in this religion otherwise they have nothing to do with islam. they do not know about the religious matters. the women should remain calm and quite to achieve the high status to avoid to be the target. however the women in all and those who come out of their homes due to some problems must be helped to solve the problems regargless of the religion and creed………..amin.
the women need some sort of lesson to be patient and accept whatever the rligion says. otherwise there is looking no change either in the religion or minds of the men. so no one is ready to entertain their stupidities. |
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iloveshariah
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Saturday, August 27, 2005 - 12:29 PM
Some one posted the horrors of arranged marriage. But some oen also should point out teh horrors of love marraige too. We have cases like a boyfriend chopping his girfriends head and leaving it in a fridge. So many other things. Sorrt to sleeepy to post more
Best is Islamic marriage |
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ibrahim
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, August 27, 2005 - 3:15 PM
| What is an Islamic Marriage in ur Opinion? plz DO Explain |
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Loveall
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, August 27, 2005 - 9:41 PM
| My point of view does not mean that the parents must not be convinced or taken into the confidence. But it must always be tried to convince them and even some other people may be brought to do so, if our decision is right. But what should be done if they (parents) DON’T AT ALL agree. In this situation of disagreement of the parents, No option other than to chide or confront them seems to be there. And does Islam allow confronting them and becoming the rebellious? This is the only what I mean. |
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Loveall
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Saturday, August 27, 2005 - 9:54 PM
To, Mr. Ibrahim,
In this forum, like other ones, are all the posts, still here, related to the topic? |
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