| Author | Topic |
saba2
Moderator
PAKISTAN
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 Posted - Sunday, October 3, 2010 - 1:42 AM 
| an interesting topic and a very crucial one in Pakistan we have as always successful marriages which are arranged and absolute disasters as well. I feel more and more parents are willing to listen to their children and respect their opinion which is the right thing to do. |
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safimera
CANADA
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Posted - Sunday, October 3, 2010 - 4:03 AM
According to my research:
Love marriage and arranged marriage, both have almost SAME success and divorce rate.
I found divorces and success in both cases almost equally in my society.
So it is something else which makes your marriage successful, whether it happens as love or arranged marriage.
I am in favour of something mixed; i would say it "LIKE MARRIAGE"..haha....
real LOVE I believe develops after marriage... after a little time living together.....
but nowdays boys and girls SHOULD atleast like each other before marriage...otherwise i see, it causes great difficulty to continue.
And LIKE MEANS: that you say : he/she is ok or even so so or not bad etc......
but if really something u find irritating or discomforting to you in him/her , then a girl or boy should not marry to him or her....
Lastly, I think if marriage is arranged, even then in present time, taking advantage of present day technology : girls and boys, with the knowledge and permission of parents, should allow to talk on phone or internet chatting for few times ......
now young people, especially girls, know a lot as compared to our olden days and they want to ask it to their future spouses before saying "yes".....
i think, Islam has no problem with it.....
God Knows Better
Edited by: safimera on Sunday, October 03, 2010 4:10 AM |
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saba2
Moderator
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Sunday, October 3, 2010 - 2:16 PM
| In villages it is not acceptable for a girl to say she will marry someone she chooses and a match is made irrespective of what the girl or for that matter boy wants, happiness compatibility are not on the list of priorities.Violence is acceptable and not a basis for divorce, not much has changed but in cities yes things have changed a little and in educated families not only the choice of the girl is considered but the family is willing to accept her choice and give the couple their blessing. |
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Sanwal
INDIA
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Posted - Wednesday, October 13, 2010 - 2:36 PM
quote:
According to my research:
Love marriage and arranged marriage, both have almost SAME success and divorce rate.
Could you please give the detail of your research? |
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safimera
CANADA
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Posted - Thursday, October 14, 2010 - 9:46 AM
what sort of detail???????????
I do not get your point...
sorry !!
can u explain what detail you want???? |
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Sanwal
INDIA
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Posted - Thursday, October 14, 2010 - 10:15 AM
| Where u did the research, When u did the research, who was included in the research, what was age of the couples,how long after the marriage u noted ur results. what complicartions occured after how long,???? etc etc........... |
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saba2
Moderator
PAKISTAN
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Posted - Thursday, October 14, 2010 - 10:35 AM
Sanwal I don't think Safimera meant it as a scientific research or study, it was his general observation. So what do you think an arranged marriage or a marriage where the couple choose their own partner? which one works better?
Edited by: saba2 on Thursday, October 14, 2010 10:42 AM |
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Sanwal
INDIA
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Posted - Thursday, October 14, 2010 - 12:35 PM
| OK, if it's his observation otherwise a research or study is something entirely different. So far as your question is concerned, I agree to such an observation that outcome of both the categories is almost same. |
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safimera
CANADA
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Posted - Thursday, October 14, 2010 - 6:01 PM
saba2==> thank u for helping me out....
sanwal===>sorry I used word "research"...it was my observation.....but when I used "my" research....it indicated the research in my personal way ...not in scientific way.....
by the way ....it was not at all unscientific...i collected data from time to time for my observation from my surrounding...my family, my friends, my friends' friends, my colleagues in different jobs and then newspapers, internet, online different forums etc etc during last almost 30 yrs........so it is not totally unscientific...but yes, I did not keep any written record of it..just observation spanning the time period from my childhood till present.
hope it would answer your concern...lols
by the way ..i am happy that you agree with my observation.... |
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Sanwal
INDIA
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Posted - Saturday, October 16, 2010 - 9:10 AM
quote:
by the way ....it was not at all unscientific...i collected data from time to time for my observation from my surrounding...my family, my friends, my friends' friends, my colleagues in different jobs and then newspapers, internet, online different forums etc etc during last almost 30 yrs........so it is not totally unscientific...but yes, I did not keep any written record of it..just observation spanning the time period from my childhood till present.
By the way, you can't call it scientific unless you document it properly after fulfilling all the pre-requisite requirements and getting approved by the concerned body.
If you have observation during the last almost 30 years and did not keep any written record of it how you then concluded the results SAME? Same is only if you observed suppose 100 cases of each then 50 cases of each have the same results. |
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safimera
CANADA
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Posted - Saturday, October 16, 2010 - 2:23 PM
| SORRY!!!!!!!!! BIG BROTHER.....[b]Text |
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