| Author | Topic |
nads786
UNITED KINGDOM
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 Topic initiated on Saturday, January 7, 2006 - 10:26 PM 
Being Good to your Parents
In today’s rapid-paced life, we often tend to get so busy that we forget our parents’ rights. Family values have significantly dropped in our lives, and our friends often become more important to us than our own relatives.
What better can emphasize the good treatment of our parents than the following verse from the Qur’an (interpretation of the meaning)
{And your Lord has commanded that you shall not serve (any) but Him, and show goodness to your parents. If either one or both of them reach old age with you, say not to them (so much as) "Ugh" nor rebuke them, and speak to them in honorable terms} [Qur'an Al-Israa 17:23].
There are two noteworthy conclusions that may be noticed from this verse. First, Allah the Exalted has called for good treatment of parents immediately after ordering us to worship Him. This proves the importance of being kind to our parents and the elevated status in which Allah (SWT) has placed parents in our lives. Second, He has ordered us not to utter even the least of inappropriate comments to them; thus it is very surprising that some people yell at their parents or even tell them to shut up.
Furthermore, when Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) was asked which deed was the best, he replied: “The prayer at its appointed hour”. He was asked: “Then what?”, to which he replied: “Kindness to the parents”. Again he was asked: “Then what?”. He replied: “Earnest struggle (Jihad) in the cause of Allah [Muslim].”
Whether or not you live with your parents, or if both of them are still alive, here are some tips to a good relationship with them:red]
If you live with your parents
Bring something home every now and then. For example, buy them a gift or a cake whenever you receive your paycheck.
Make sure to spend time with them every day, whether it be for reciting Qur’an or reading hadiths together, conducting household chores, or just plain friendly talk.
Take them out. My mother is extremely happy when I go out for a walk with her.
Obeying whatever they ask you to do, as long as it complies with Islam.
If you don’t live with your parents
Visit them regularly -- say once a week or every two weeks.
If you are unable to visit them often because you live far away for example, then do the next best thing and call them frequently. Also, you may send them letters, and don’t forget greeting cards on Islamic occasions (Ramadan, Eid, etc.)
If one or both of your parents have passed away
In the authentic hadith, a man came to the Prophet (may peace be upon him) and asked him whether he can do any good for his parents after they passed away. The Prophet (may peace be upon him) told him to do the following:
· Supplication and istighfar for them,
· Executing their will,
· Connecting with relatives that are likely to be cut with the parents’ death, and
· Honoring their friends
In another hadith, the Prophet (may peace be upon him) also taught us that among the good deeds that benefit one who has passed away is a ‘righteous son that supplicates for him/her.’
Difficulties with parents
Reverts to Islam often tend to face difficulties with their non-Muslim parents. Likewise, Muslims who take up new acts of worship (such as growing a beard or wearing niqab) might get into unpleasant situations with them.
Although one should not abandon such acts of worship in order to obey one’s parents, one should still retain a good relationship with both parents and treat them kindly. Allah the Exalted has ordered us to obey our parents even if they are non-Muslims – but, once again, as long as what they ask complies with Islam. Conditions such as this require a good deal of patience and can be considered opportunities to show your parents that your newly-found beliefs have actually made you better and closer to them.
Finally, I would like to close with the supplication of prophet Ibrahim (may peace be upon him) as in the Qur’an (interpretation of the meaning)
{My Lord! Make me keep up prayer and from my offspring (too), O our Lord, and accept my prayer: O our Lord! grant me protection and my parents and the believers on the day when the reckoning shall come to pass} [Ibrahim 14:40-41]
Edited by: xxbasxx on Saturday, January 21, 2006 6:08 PM |
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bilal_sahib
UNITED KINGDOM
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 Posted - Saturday, January 14, 2006 - 12:51 PM 
Salams,
I think everyone can use reminders like this every now and again.... As you said, family values are often lost in modern life. It is, after all, our parents that brought us up and still look after us!
J.K!
Bilal |
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nads786
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Saturday, January 14, 2006 - 1:00 PM
w/salaams bilal
yeh i think this issue is really important especially in the society we live in these days its easy to forget how much you really value and appreciate ur mummy and daddy
lol
take care
nadia |
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xxbasxx
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 6:16 PM
Salamz ^_^
i have edited the post by adding colours because i am evil BUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHA
anyway
Jazak'Allah hu khairunn nads ^_^ wonderful message Masha'Allah.
yes, today's world doesnt just forget about how much we really value and appreciate our parents but todays world also forgets that, regardless of wether our parents do or say things which upset us, it is our duty and their right that we treat them with kindness.
im young and my temper is terrible so i find this hard to do and whenever my parents call me i know they're going to ask me to do something for them and i always let out a sigh *bad mod* ive stopped that now, or at least im trying to stop, because i remembered that, everytime i call them, im asking something of them too.
if you're my age (quite young ;) ) and living with your parents you absolutely must attain a good relationship with your rents. me and mom arent just mother and daughter, we're friends too. i can tell her pretty much everything and, yes, it took a while to get to this point (FIFTEEN YEARS) hehe but as long as you trust your parents and you do things to make sure that they trust you, a healthy relationship can be attained.
if you painted something but with every brush stroke your arm would ache and strain would take over your entire body, would you like it if your painting just jumped off your wall and started disobeying your every word? i know its a rubbish example but our parents went through a lot of hardships to get us into this world. everyone that has ever typed on this forum has proven to us that they have parents that want them to achieve a good education by sending them to school and having them learn to spell and then come on this website and discuss Islam. im sure it must be very painful, emotionally, for them to see us making mistakes everyday that they have warned us against.
we must always lsiten to our parents ^_^
Wassalam .xXx. |
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xxbasxx
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 6:19 PM
OH and ps- Islam is a universal religion and teaches us to value our family so very much and a lot of people say that they like Islam because of its family values and because it is so inclusive and etc etc and yeah so we must remember to treat our families with love and kindness and respect because this is what Islam teaches us
Wassalam .xXx.
Edited by: xxbasxx on Saturday, January 21, 2006 6:19 PM |
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bilal_sahib
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 6:22 PM
meh out-reply me if you will basmah...
that was actually a really good example, and really true.... if you didnt read basmah and nadia's posts, er.. go back and read them.....
the painting and wall thing is so true and such a good way of putting it, so if like me you have a short fuse, just try and remember everything you owe your parents .......
bilal |
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bilal_sahib
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 6:23 PM
mleh is ANYONE apart from us reading these posts?!?!
Edited by: bilal_sahib on Saturday, January 21, 2006 6:24 PM |
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xxbasxx
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 6:50 PM
Salamz
THEY
HAD
BETTER
BE
.xXx.
Edited by: xxbasxx on Saturday, January 21, 2006 6:50 PM |
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xxbasxx
UNITED KINGDOM
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Posted - Saturday, January 21, 2006 - 6:52 PM
Salamz again XD
thank you for the compliments ya akhi XD
you should try and write random contributions too
as should all of us
Wassalam
.xXx. |
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